Uck!

I've been coming across ads for some liquor I've never heard of. It's called Canadian Club and they've been running the ad in a number of magazines. The basic idea, I guess, is that old men who were lascivious bastards when they were young, back in the 1960's, drank a lot of whiskey. What a great advertising message! What a great message! Skeezy men drink our whiskey! You should, too!

The other, equally disgusting direction, is that they directly reference "your" father. Your... father?! What the hell were they thinking when they decided to bring up images of good ol' dad banging everything with two legs while drunk?! This doesn't make me want to drink, it makes me want to obsessively shower.

UPDATE 4/2/2010: I found this great spoof ad that really turns the concept on its head.

Huh...

I noticed that almost everything I've posted in the past few days is about East Greenwich. I don't even live there. I need to hang out in different towns.

QUICKVIEW: Cornucopia- ++ / $$$

The friendly staff elevated an otherwise bland experience. The insides is arranged in such a away as to provide a feeling of high-class dining, but the Wal*Mart-chic decor ruins the impression. Tables sit right up next to the window, giving diners a nice view of Main Street, and walkers a nice view of diners. Menu is limited on any given night with an affordable prix-fixe menu. Choice of soup, appetizer, and main course never totals more than $30, making this a good choice for those looking for an upgrade to TGI-Fridays. The mid-day menu runs 'till 2:30pm and is also very affordable. Nothing cracks $15, making it a good spot for lunch-hunters. Entrees are decently imaginative with nice ingredient choices, but preparation is sub-par and ingredients are sometimes underwhelming. Certainly not bad enough to never go back. If I'm in the neighborhood I'd probably make another trip.

Cornucopia: ++
Price range for two: $50-$60

http://www.cornucopia-ri.com/

Cornucopia
241 Main Street
East Greenwich, RI. 02818
401-884-5660

QUICKVIEW: Black & Blue- ++ / $$$

Black and Blue advertises itself as a restaurant and speakeasy. I don't understand the speakeasy part. It just seems like a restaurant to me. Taking the place of The Indian Club, they changed the color scheme to a subdued, trendy blue; and almost nothing else. Nice interior, with a gigantic explosion of color in what looks like Jackson Pollock's nightmare on the wall as the centerpiece. The dining area is somewhat small, with the bar inefficiently taking up most of the back. The menu is, again, steakhouse-ish. Damned steakhouses are everywhere. The menu is competitively priced. Wine list is very good. A large list of affordable wines combines with an even larger list of more expensive wines. List skews American, with many high-end options.

Appetizers are average. Fried lump crab meat was acceptable, but barely spiced and rather bland. Seafood is nice, but prepared sub-par. Scallops were overcooked and sandy. Sauce was too salty. Steak was overcooked, but not by much, and the pinot noir reduction sauce was sweet and satisfying. Orange and spice chicken was very tasty. Cappuccino was below average. Desserts were disappointing. Flourless chocolate torte was dry, while the banana & ladyfingers thing was very bland. Entering the crowded steakhouse scene means lots of competition from excellent places. The nearby Eleven Forty Nine outclasses this place turn for turn. Still, it was good enough where I might come back.

Black & Blue: ++
Price range for two: $40-$75

BLACK & BLUE
455 Main Street
East Greenwich, RI 02818